photo-18Unlike many others, I wasn’t sore this morning. I suppose it’s understandable if one is indeed sore after completing so many thrusters and burpees.

I worked out with the very small 9:45 am crew, including Evelyn, Thomasina, Angelina, and Emily.

Begin with 800m row
Then complete 50 reps of the following activities:
Hand release dead-lifts
Back squats
Shoulder to overhead
Lateral box jumps (24/20)
Complete 50 double unders after completing all reps of any activity

Men 125 – 155 | DL 185, SQ 115, S2O 75

You may complete activities in any order. You must, however, complete 50 double unders (or 150 single unders) after completing all reps of any activity. You are allowed 1 barbell. The barbell must begin from the floor, i.e., no racks allowed.

I pre-determined the order that I would complete activities. After rowing 800m, I began shoulder to overhead, completing the first 45 reps as power jerks and the last five reps as jerk. I completed S2O in 5 sets of 10 reps, thus I cleaned the bar 5 times.

I now truly love cleaning. [Insert inappropriate comment about jerking here.]

The first round of double unders didn’t go that well, but I did manage to complete about 25 unbroken.

I then completed back squats, doing so in reps of 15, 20, & 15. I occasionally completed low bar back squats so mix things up a bit. It helped. I also occasionally paused to shake out my legs. I cleaned the bar 3 times.

The second round of double unders went better than the first.

While I hadn’t intended to complete 50 lateral box jumps unbroken, that is nonetheless what I did. Box jumps were a welcome relief from lifting.

The third round of double unders went even better, and if I recall I completed the last 40 unbroken.

I finished with dead-lifts, completing in reps of 10, 15, 15, & 10. No matter the weight, dead-lifts begin to feel heavy when you’re completing that many reps.

I completed the last round of double unders unbroken. Yay!

Time = 24:19

This workout was perfect for today, as it was neither too easy nor too challenging. Again, yay!

Jeff and I visited Brenda and Larry today, and stopped by the Reebok outlet whilst in Mebane. I had already paid for my purchase when Mike A. entered the store. He asked for some help picking out CrossFit shoes, and it was then that Jeff pointed out the shoes on sale. I purchased a pair of weightlifting shoes for a mere $40!

That. Made. My. Day.

2014 CrossFit Games Open Recap, Grades, and Closing Thoughts

I’ve been CrossFitting for 6 years now, and this is the 5th time I’ve completing at least one workout and the 1st time I’ve completed all five workouts of any open. I didn’t complete all 5 workouts in the past due to injury, inability, and/or disinterest.

I’m pleased with my overall performance, and I’m truly glad that I did indeed complete all five workouts.

Workout 14.1 | Double unders and power snatches
In the not-so-distant past, I would’ve struggled mightily with both power snatches and double unders. That’s certainly not the case now. I do, however, need to work on stringing together more unbroken power snatches, as when I got tired I began to do singles. Oh, and 75# is half of my body weight.

Grade: B+

Workout 14.2 | OHS and chest to bar pull-ups
I was the most pleased with my performance on this workout, particularly with number of rounds/reps completed and that I was able to successfully OHS 95# so many damned times. Chest to bar pull-ups presented little challenge, and OHS presented less of a challenge than expected.

Grade: A-

Workout 14.3 | Dead-lift ladder and box jumps
I was less than happy with my performance on this, as I should’ve made it though all of the 275# dead-lifts and 15 box jumps. I did, however, complete all box jumps, i.e., I didn’t complete box steps as so many others did. Oh, and my form didn’t break for dead-lifts, so that’s an accomplishment. Oh, and 275# felt pretty f@cking heavy.

Grade: B-

Workout 14.4 | Row for calories, toes to bar, wall ball shots, and power cleans
I have very mixed feelings about this workout, as I was pleased with the row, exceedingly displeased with toes to bar, and exceedingly pleased that, for the very first time ever, I completed 135# power cleans in a workout. I was very upset that I didn’t make it to the muscle ups, as I am confident that I could’ve completed a rep of two. This was the only workout of the five that I seriously considered attempting a second time.

Grade: C+

Workout 14.5 | Thrusters and barbell facing burpees
One of my least favorite activities, thrusters, paired with one of my most favorite activities, burpees — yet I failed at three barbell jumps! WTF? I have never completed that many thrusters in one workout, and I never want to do so again. I was neither pleased nor displeased with my performance.

Grade: B-

Overall grade: B, i.e., above average

There was a lot of grumbling about the workouts, particularly in regard to the activities included, e.g., double unders and chest to bar pull-ups, the time domains, as well as, and with 14.4 specifically, the weight of the lifts. As a box owner and coach, I was upset, as I wanted CrossFit Surmount athletes to have a rewarding experience. Unfortunately, many athletes felt disappointed, even disillusioned. Workout 14.2 was, for most athletes, a 3- or 6-minute workout.

As an athlete, I kinda sorta liked the programming, as it was both challenging and doable. Could I have done better? Perhaps.

I am most proud of myself for not being a hypocrite. I’ve consistently impressed upon CrossFit Surmount athletes that the workouts should only be done once, and for a variety of reasons:

  1. If the workout(s) was a true competition, you’d only have one attempt.
  2. CrossFit, by definition, is constantly varied. Doing the same workout more than once within a year, let alone within four days, is anything but varied.
  3. Repeatedly doing the same movements leads to overuse injuries.
  4. I don’t know of anyone who would qualify for regionals based upon an improved score on any one workout.
  5. At the end of the day, it’s just a workout. My score, time, or ranking doesn’t change the person, coach, and/or athlete I am.

I’m sure that many members are happy that the focus will no longer be on the Games. I know that I’ll be happy to provide consistent programming.


CrossFit Games Open 14.5

I had planned on completing the workout at 8:30 am, but was unable to do so, try as I might. An out-of-town visitor was completing the workout, and, as she’s competing in the Open, she requested a certified judge. That’d be me. I had earlier asked what she expected her finishing time to be, and she said, “Twenty minutes of less.” As I expected that it would take some of the CrossFit Surmount athletes as much as 30 minutes to complete, I thought this would give me enough time to warm up after she completed the round.

This wasn’t to be the case, as it took her (and others in later rounds) more than 30 minutes to complete.


I attempted 1 thruster and immediately decided that I wasn’t nearly warmed up enough to continue.


Jeff had planned on completing the workout at 9:45, but as there were an odd number of people present, he was unable to do so. During one of the brief breaks I suggested that we both do the workout after the Community WOD. And that’s what we did.

Workout 14.5

21-18-15-12-9-6-3 reps for time of:
Thrusters (95)
Barbell facing burpees

Uhm, that’s 84 thrusters (boo!) and 84 burpees (yay!). Uhm, 95# if more than 65% of my bodyweight.

My goals were to complete in less than 16 minutes and to do burpees unbroken.

I hate thrusters.

I completed the round of 21 in reps of 7, and the remaining rounds in reps of as many as 6, as few as 2, and usually 3 or 4. Mostly just 3 at a time. And that’s okay, as I had no failed reps.

What I didn’t expect was for the jump over the barbell to be so difficult. I missed 3 jumps. Yes, I missed 3 jumps. Jeff didn’t even have an opportunity to yell “No rep” before I had already begun re-doing.

This workout was exhausting. During the round of 15 I thought, “I could just stop now and attempt tomorrow. Shit, if I do that I’ll have to do 21 & 18 thrusters. I don’t want to do that again.”

Time =15:51

I don’t ever want to do this workout again.


Thank god I’m a country boy.

I was too tired to blog last night. Am I forgiven? Wait, I offered no apology.

It’s difficult to blog at this moment, as Meg is kneading my chest. Bad, kitty, you’re a bad kitty! But I sure do love her.

Yesterday I worked out with the 4 pm athletes led by Coach Liz. (Nice job, Liz!)

EMOTM for 10 minutes
3 power clean & jerks

I worked up to a set at 135#. Slow first pull, yo. What a difference! I’m truly enjoying the Olympic lifts. Yo.

8-min AMRAP
Odd-numbered minutes
Sumo dead-lift high pulls (100)
Even-numbered minutes
Hollow rocks

Rest 2 minutes

8-min AMRAP

Odd-numbered minutes
Bent over rows (100)
Even-numbered minutes
Lateral bar hops 

Wow, this was tough. I had no set goals. Imagine that.

SDHPs: 20+16+16+15=66
Hollow rocks: 33+33+33+34=133
Bent over rows: 40+27+27+28=122
Lateral bar hops: 76+77+68+67=288

For both SDHPs and bent over rows, I completed quite a few more reps the first round than I was able to complete on subsequent rounds. The same could be said for lateral bar hops, although reps didn’t decrease as dramatically. I was most pleased with consistency of hollow rocks.

I joined Coach Emily and the 11:45 am crew for today’s workout.

10006990_639328482799143_320345207_nTeam WOD

35-minute AMRAP
Teams of 3, 4, or 5
Complete the following activities:
10 tire flips
200 (100/arm) sledgehammer swings
100 jumping jacks
100 Abmat sit-ups

Only 1 partner may work at a time, including flipping tire. Partners must take turns in the same order, may only complete 1 tire flip at a time, and may complete up to 5 reps of any other activity at a time. 

Bonnie and Kelly-May volunteered to be on my team. Thanks, you two! Effective communication was the key to completing this workout successfully.

Score = 5 rounds + 7 tire flips

We flipped the heaviest of the 3 tires. Both Bonnie and I completed alternating arm sledgehammer swings, and we were both able to complete 10 swings very quickly. Why, you ask? Because we both have experience chopping and splitting wood.

To Emily, Susan, and Alexus, I offer my apologies for (possibly) counting out loud too loudly.



Susie was kind enough to take this picture of my showing of my new lululemon shorts! And ass.

I worked out with the 8:30 am athletes, let by Coach Emily. (Nice job, Emily!)


Back squat
Complete 30 unbroken reps

I warmed up with five or so reps @ 95 & 115, and then put 145# on the bar, 60@ of 1RM. I did not follow the advice I gave to athletes, i.e., break up into sets of 12, 10, & 8, and instead went out hard to see how many I could indeed complete without having to stop. I completed 18, and the remaining lifts in sets of 4 reps. Whilst racking bar I said, “Holy shit.” Yup, I said that.

8-min AMRAP
5 KB goblet squats (52 60)
5 Russian KB swings
5/leg forward & reverse lunges

Rest 1 minute

6-min AMRAP
5 knees to elbows
15 unbroken double unders

Yup, I increased weight for goblet squats and KB swings, and only counted rounds of 15 unbroken double unders.

I completed 7 rounds + 10 reps (5 goblet squats & 5 KB swings) the first AMRAP and 10 rounds + 1 knees to elbow the second AMRAP for a total score of  17 rounds + 11 reps.

I completed all rounds of reps unbroken, albeit I did have to re-do a round of double unders after failing on the 10th rep. Dammit. (You knew that was coming. (That’s what he said.))

Sixty pound goblet squats felt heavy. Imagine that!


Five and four.

1972510_10152016130882196_1654968554_nJeff was kind enough to coach the 9:45 am session. I led the warmup and demonstrated proper form and execution of activities, and we were off to the races.


Option A
Run 1 mile
Then complete 6 rounds of 9 reps of the following:
— handstand pushups
— burpee pull-ups
— banded dead-lifts (185/133)
— ring dips
— burpee box jumps (30/24)
— banded dead-lifts 
Then run 1 mile

Option B
Run 1K
Then complete 4, 5, or 6 rounds of 9 reps of the following:
— pushups
— pull-ups
— burpees

— dead-lifts (135/93)
— dips
— box jumps or box steps (24/20)
— 9 burpees

— 9 dead-lifts 
Then run 1K

Option C

This was as challenging as I thought it was going to be, and just as much fun!

I began by running 10,000m, and when I arrived back at the box to turn around Jeff said, “You ran a 4-minute mile?” Ha! I’ve never run a 4-minute mile, and that ship has sailed. That ship has probably passed the Panama Canal by now. I ran an additional 600m and returned to the box. My first words were, “You all are kicking my ass!’

Doza, Liz, and Kelli were stationed nearby. I wonder what they thought of my grunting during dead-lifts.

My goal was to complete all rounds of HSPUs, burpee pull-ups, ring dips, and burpee box jumps unbroken, and I came so very close to achieving that goal. Dammit. I broke all sets of banded dead-lifts into reps of 5 and 4. I forgot, however, to wear my weightlifting belt. 

I ran a mile in 6:30, and began HSPUs. While the first round of HSPUs was slow and methodical, my form and speed improved and increased as I progressed through the workout. I completed all but the 5th round in unbroken reps, completing the 5th round in reps of 7 & 2. I was exceedingly happy that I managed to complete the very last round unbroken. 

I did indeed complete rounds of burpee pull-ups, ring dips, and burpee box jumps unbroken. Banded dead-lifts felt heavy, as well they should. At one point Liz and I were doing dead-lifts at the same time and in very close proximity. She began to move her bar away and I said, “No need to do that. This is CrossFit.” Poor Liz and had be in very close proximity to my profuse sweating, my swearing, and my grunting. 

I finished the final round and once again ran 10,000m and 6oom, and finished in a time of 50:03

I’m not a hypocrite. At least not today. 

I may be addicted to CrossFit. Maybe.

I had a tremendous amount of fun earlier today doing today’s partner WOD with Ms. Felicia!

I did, however, want to attempt solo, ’cause that’s how I roll.

25 RFT

6 stiff-legged dead-lifts (75)
3 hang power snatches (75)
1 wall crawl

My goals were to complete all rounds of reps unbroken (not a lofty goal) and to complete in fewer than 20 minutes.

Uhm, yeah, so Kelly-May decided to race me! I’m not sure if that was indeed the case, but it certainly felt that way, as we were neck and neck for the first 10 or so rounds. And then she took the lead. After having completed so many snatches and wall crawls earlier in the day, my shoulders were feeling, well, tired. After completing dead-lifts I would often rest a moment and shake out my arms.

I also grunted at the finish of each and every snatch. I did. I grunted. Loudly.

I do have a strong finishing kick, and I was able to surpass Kelly-May during the last 5 rounds. ‘Twas a close race, and she is a worthy adversary.

I finished in 17:48. Rx, bitches.

Total for the day:
270 stiff-legged dead-lifts
135 hang power snatches
45 wall crawls

I think I may rest mañana.

1966697_636267679771890_1761168666_n 1625708_636267613105230_1899364201_n


The title of this blog is an inside joke.

I had the pleasure of partnering with Felicia for today’s WOD. How did that happen? I left it up to Janet, Felicia, and Kachu to decide who would have to partner with me, you know, because it’s sometimes difficult to be my partner. No, not because I’m an ass, but rather because I work quickly, allowing my partner little time to rest. If you’re my partner, I get thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much rest. If I’m your partner, you get this much rest.

First, a heartfelt thank you to Felicia for putting up with my speed, singing, and dancing.

40 RFT

6 stiff-legged dead-lifts (75/63)
3 hang power snatches (75/63)
1 wall crawl
Partners alternate activities

Felicia began with dead-lifts and I ended with a wall crawl. The weight felt light today, even for hang power cleans. Even though dead-lifts were easy, the wall crawls were easier.

Felicia and I worked well together, and I did provide encouragement and support. I also periodically told her, “Rest when you need to. You don’t have to work at my pace.”

I’m just that nice.

Our time was 28:33. Rx, bitches.

We both completed 120 stiff-legged dead-lifts, 60 hang power snatches, and 20 wall crawls.

Coach Emily was kind enough to take a few pictures.

Team Weaver!
Team Weaver!
Me being me.
Me being me.
Felicia insisted that she kiss my head. Who wouldn't want to do so?!
Felicia insisted that she kiss my head. Who wouldn’t want to do so?!

As I’m my own boss, I’m considering suing myself for sexual harassment.

‘Twas so nice…

…I did it twice.

Sessions were cancelled this morning, as the roads were an icy mess. I coached the 11:45 am session and worked out at both the 4 and 5:15 pm sessions. Why? Uhm, why not?


EMOTM for 5 minutes
Up to 30 second continuous L-sit

I completed rounds on rings (1, 2, & 4) and bar, and held all L-sits for 30 seconds, although the first was the only strict round.

16-min AMRAP
5 forward rolls
10’ sprint
10 medicine ball cleans
90-second accumulated plank hold
10’ sprint 

I used a 30# wall ball the first session and a 25# wall ball the second session. My goal was to complete all rounds of rolls and medicine ball cleans unbroken and to hold the 90-second plank unbroken as well, i.e., without resting. Done, done, and done.

I was a plank hold (although I did hold for a mere 3 seconds) shy of 8 rounds the first session and 55 seconds shy of 8 rounds the second session.

80 forward rolls
160 medicine ball cleans (80 @ 30# & 25#)
22:38 of plank hold

I coached the first ever session of CFE at CrossFit Surmount this evening, and had a wonderful time doing so! I had forgotten how much I missed coaching running. I ran a 100m interval with each of the athletes, so I also got to run. Yup, I love running. Have I mentioned that before?

CFE runs through mid-May. I’d also like to offer the Barbell Club again. Whew. I need coaches. Let me know if you’re interested!

Oh, I have very high execrations.