Am I allowed to feel this way?

Luke says, "Uhm, you're in my way of napping, Daddy Paul!"
Luke says, “Uhm, you’re in my way of napping, Daddy Paul!”
Luke doesn't like to share "his" couch.
Luke doesn’t like to share “his” couch.
Luke napping with me.
Luke napping with me.
Luke at the 6:30 session. He can sleep through most anything.
Luke at the 6:30 session. He can sleep through most anything.
Proof that I kept the bar by my legs. Center of gravity, yo.
Proof that I kept the bar by my legs. Center of gravity, yo.

I woke up feeling tired this morning. Very, very tired. I coached the 6 and 7 am sessions, took Luke for a walk, coached the 9:30 am session, took a 10-minute Zac (i.e., “cat”) nap, coached the 11:45 am session, and then took a two-hour nap. A two-hour nap.

And I could’ve napped longer.

I had decided prior to napping that I’d decide upon waking if I was going to do today’s conditioning. I kept going forth and back, and finally decided to just go to the box, warm up, attempt a thruster, hang power clean, and sumo dead-lift high pull, and then take it from there. I arrived at the box just as the 4 pm athletes were beginning KB snatches. I set up my equipment and warmed up on my own.

20-min AMRAP
5 thrusters (95)
7 hang power cleans

My one and only goal was to have no failed reps. This may sound like an easy goal to achieve, but it was actually quite lofty!

I surprised myself today. I completed all rounds of 5 thrusters and 7 hang power cleans unbroken. Whaaaaat? I also wisely “rested” at the top of the press of a couple of thrusters to ensure that I could complete the thrusters with no failed reps.

Hang power cleans felt, well, easy. Extension, pull under the bar, land on bent knees, fast elbows, rise to full extension, bar to mid-thigh and then above the knee.

The only round of SDHPs that I completed unbroken was the first round. Whaaaaat? In my defense, I was kind of winded from the hang power cleans and thrusters, and I knew I could power through SDHPs.

I had completed all but the SDHPs of round 5 at the halfway mark. I figured I could get 9 rounds if I held on and paced myself. Yup, this was a grueling workout, and effective pacing was critical. And time went by too damned fast! And ninety-five pounds in 65% of my bodyweight. Shit started to feel heavy.

I had completed all but SDHPs of round 9 with a mere 60 seconds remaining. I willed myself to complete the reps, and I did so in 30 seconds. I told myself that I’d begin thrusters when there was just 1o seconds remaining. As the clock counted down I thought, “Just pick up the damned bar, Paul. Pick it up.” I began thrusters with 12 seconds remaining and I’m glad that I did, as I completed 5 thrusters!

Score = 9 rounds + 5 reps

Aside #1

I’m 50/50 on the Kinsey scale for introvert/extrovert. Last night I made myself go to a farewell party for the lovely Doreen, and I’m very happy that I did! (I was, however, the first to leave.) During a conversation over dinner someone jokingly mentioned that I was a braggart. I asked for evidence. “You say how awesome you are, how handsome you are, etc.” Okay, I do, but jokingly. I asked, “Do I gloat? Do I say, ‘My score is better than yours! I lift heaver weights than you do! I crushed you!'” Folks agreed that I do not. Nor do I like when others do so. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: the only person I’m competing with is myself. That being said, read on.

Aside #2

I struggle with members who don’t listen to me or the other coaches. No, I won’t name names, so don’t even ask. There is an individual that basically ignores my suggestions. For example, they never put their thumb around the bar when completing dead-lifts, presses, and — most troubling — cleans or snatches. When I asked them why they said, “That’s what my coach at my old box told me to do.” I explained that it’s impossible to use a hook grip if your thumb isn’t even around the bar. They looked at me as if I didn’t know what I’m talking about and said, “That’s the way I was taught, and it works for me.”

Well, okay then.

I’m not done yet: They refuse to keep neck neutral for dead-lift, jump high and backward for cleans and snatches, tilt neck up at extension for almost all lifts, etc.

I’m not done yet. For SDHPs the bar must touch the clavicle and the elbows must be above the bar. It’s not a rep if this doesn’t happen. Yet they counted every rep today. Every shitty rep.

I’m not done yet. The worst offense is slamming the damned bar to the floor. As I’ve said repeatedly, there are times when dropping the bar — in control — is acceptable, but slamming the bar to the ground is never appropriate. What useful purpose does it serve? Okay, you’ve brought attention to yourself. Good for you, but bad for the other athletes who lose focus. Oh, and if you don’t control the bar it puts others in risk of injury.

Yes, I’ve asked and then told them to not slam the bar. I’ve been ignored.

I’m done now.

Aside #3

I don’t want to sound like a braggart, I really don’t. I am, however, quite proud of myself. Today’s workout was very challenging, and not at all suited to my strengths. I nonetheless focused on form and pacing, and didn’t miss a single rep.

I’m proud of myself. Am I allowed to feel this way? Or should I just keep it to myself…


One thought on “Am I allowed to feel this way?

  1. Fuck no! Sorry, i have turrets! Seriously of course, modeling exceptional skill, being proud, but most of all being an inspiration that if you put the work in the result will follow is all qualities I adore of you! Braggart is a negative term to describe jealously (envy) or maybe they were teasing (as you do at times so don’t take personally), you wouldn’t have the proud members you do if you didn’t! By the way, i am cringing to get back to my little space there, it kills me to miss. But last week (i don’t like to complain about pain, i try to keep it low key, but I wanted to really give right shoulder it a good weeks rest, get the MRI completed and read (which was ridiculous to get in a timely fashion). I had no Rotator cuff tears just tendinopathy and peritendinobursitis. They offered cortisone shot, I refused, pain with purpose. I feel that I can judge better and right now burpees and push-ups I need to be careful with. Pull-ups ok, knees to elbows, ok, presses or overhead questionable so staying conservative.

    Anyway, got a part time job too so trying to figure out if I am coming in early morning or later afternoon! Cheers, and stay the same! Paulineeeeeeeerr

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